Merton Blog 5

As I came to a close in the semester (though probably not within my practice of Merton’s prayer book), I definitely did/do not feel like my struggle with prayer is over. But I am not too discouraged, I mean struggle and conflict is if anything, a sign of life. I always tell my YL kids, ‘when you are pissed at God, or are asking questions that fly in the face of right belief, you are being incredibly faithful, incredibly committed.’ I believe that because by investing so much emotional energy into the journey, they are attesting to the difference God can make in the world and in a life.

Another thing I recognized in my time with Merton is that environment is important. The positive feeling I got when doing this, often was connected to where I was. If I was at school or another populated area, it is not normally a great experience. If I am at the abbey in Mt. Angel, much more room change.

You have called me to be repeatedly born in the Spirit, repeatedly born in light, in knowledge, in unknowing, in faith, in awareness, in gratitude, in poverty, in presence, and in praise.”

Sometimes I am lost, sometimes I feel right at home, but God is in both extremes. Merton seems to make that clear in his writing and prayers. I guess I will see if it ever levels out.

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2 thoughts on “Merton Blog 5

  1. “I always tell my YL kids, ‘when you are pissed at God, or are asking questions that fly in the face of right belief, you are being incredibly faithful, incredibly committed.” I think this is such a powerfully affirming statement; I wish someone had told me this when I was the age of your YL kids! The wonderful irony of this is that such anger and frustration is actually a powerfully affirming hope–the hope/faith that your “pissedoffness” will be heard, affirmed, responded to.

    I really enjoyed our time at RainAndShine last week! I want to talk more with you about discipleship and your understanding of missio die. Seriously. Trust we can keep in touch.

  2. Sounds good to me, I am always down for a good theology conversation and some coffee!

    And in reference to your comment, I think there is something much more discouraging, scary, worrisome etc., when a person goes through life without directing any negative energy or emotion towards God or faith.

    Faith/God/Jesus are all too vast and/or too diversely engaging, for a person to only respond with smiles, jolly-good times and trust. That said, I have some *deeply* cynical tendencies… so my opinions may need to be taken with a grain of salt.

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